Breaking News & the Back-Story

I haven't blogged in a while, and up to this point I haven't felt ready to share this burden that has been on Daniel's and my hearts for quite some time. It began in January 2002 (a year before we married) when we still knew very little about China or the orphan situation there. Daniel and I were discussing our future family and I said that I wanted to adopt an orphan from China. I had never thought about it very deeply before that second, and it just came out. How odd to have said something I didn't even realize! That day Daniel and I had this imprint made in our hearts. It was the beginning...

To make a long story short... we got married, had 3 wonderful blessings, and then out of the blue right before Ladybug's first birthday it hit me. This stirring, and burden in my heart. I told Daniel and guess what... he felt it too. I went to Berean for "Storytime" a few weeks after that and Ladybug won a book called 'Shaoey and Dot' by Marybeth Chapman about a ladybug who finds an abandoned orphan in China and accompanies her home to her forever family in America. That about knocked me over! I was sobbing in the car driving home... Caleb in the back seat said, "What's the matter mom?" and I replied, "This is just a really good book!!!" So when we got home he took the book and sat on the couch and read it, fake-sobbing through the whole thing and saying, "Mom your right, this IS a really good book!"

But it's not that simple, and that's why it's taken me a year to even say a word about it. If you know anything about international adoption you probably know that the process is very expensive. There is no way we could come up with that kind of money. So we started saving, and carefully budgeting everything... and one year later only have a small percentage saved up- just enough to cover the application and homestudy. Recently we were talking about "walking by faith, not by sight" (2 Corinthians 5:7) and Daniel said that if we keep trying to do this on our own (1) how will God ever get the glory for making it happen? (2) It will never happen.

We also had to work through all the thoughts and feelings involved with the changes an adoption will make in our family. The child will have some type of minor special needs and will need a lot of love and attention. Ladybug will no longer be the baby. I will have much more on my plate to balance and juggle. We prayed about these things and more, and Satan whispered in my ear that I was inadequate, undeserving, and it just couldn't happen. It came in waves of 'what if's' and I even tried to stop thinking about it for a while but couldn't. Turning our backs on this child is impossible.

So we're stepping out in faith knowing that God is more than capable of placing one of His precious orphans into our family. Where God guides, He provides. I spent the last year fighting off fear over this issue and thinking it just couldn't happen but I realize now that I cannot allow the worries to be a stumbling block. I refuse to live in fear. I don't want to walk by sight anymore. Give me new perspective Lord, a vision only you can give!

The spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba, Father." Romans 8:15

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to His purpose. Romans 8:28

Right now we are in the process of selecting an agency-- we have it narrowed down to two and hope to make this decision and send in this application very soon. I don't know why this is so hard!!! God can use whichever agency and I just need to trust in Him.

Please come along side us, and pray for us. We really need your love and encouragement!

You Have Been Set Apart

You have been saved by faith alone.

Are we not blown away by what this truly means? Or are we complacent in life tuning out the resounding convictions of our hearts, ignoring the inner voice of the Spirit, deaf to what we do not want to hear?

"Because those who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God." Romans 8:14

For many years I turned away from God and conformed to the world, shutting out everything holy. It started when I was about 14 or maybe before then. I was guided by a ridiculous need to fit in with my peers and be like them. I was quietly self-centered, and discontent. I was obsessed with outer beauty and of course never measured up. What should have disgusted me had become normal. I was a slave to the philosophy of the world. It only worsened until my early 20s when I realized that I was truly miserable. By the grace of Christ I was saved from the pit I had thrown myself into. My old self was nailed to the cross and I can celebrate the new me that actually wants to know God and please Him. Amazing grace is what that is.

I am now very aware of how easy it is to slip into the world’s way of thinking. It is enticing and very sneaky. It has slipped into my own life many times when I let my guard down, as something appearing harmless and fun… but the true philosophy behind it has nothing that glorifies God. I am finally beginning to understand the true meaning of putting on the full armor of God… I need the full armor of God every day.

I will make mistakes. I am beyond imperfect and I know that. What I’m talking about is a state of mind that strives to honor God, regardless of what my plans were.

"Therefore come out from them, and be separate, says the Lord." II Corinthians 6:17

I don't imagine this to be easy. Sometimes you won't fit in. Sometimes just doing what you're doing ruffles everyone's feathers. I am not talking about something specific. I am talking about anything in life that we at some point realize does not glorify God, denying ourselves and taking up our cross and asking Him, what do you have for me? I am yours.

It might mean going completely against what the culture of the world expects.

"Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will." Romans 12:2

God speaks to the Israelites repeatedly about their being Set Apart for Him:

“You must not live according to the customs of the nations I am going to drive out before you. Because they did all these things, I abhorred them. You are to be holy to me because I, the LORD, am holy, and I have set you apart from the nations to be my own.” Leviticus 20:23,26

YOU have been Set Apart.

If we really believe that the Spirit of God is ALIVE in us—which is true for those who believe in Him— shouldn’t we strive to bring honor to him in all we do? We have been Set Apart to be known by Him... and it's really not about us at all.

We don't have to be afraid to be different; we are called to be different.

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There is 'no condemnation' for those who are in Christ Jesus.... and nothing can separate us from his love. That is the beautiful beginning and end of Romans chapter 8 and how can I not be overwhelmed by such a loving God. I see a beautiful picture painted of life led by the Spirit... Take out the 'me' and let Christ do the leading. Surrender. I really hope that what I am trying to say makes sense.

Intercessor

I just love this message.

Conversations with Ladybug

Why meal plan...

... when somebody has already done it for you?

Eat at Home 'Weekly Menus'

Granted, I don't love the sound of all her recipes... but they are easy to modify according to your liking and some of them sound really good!

Grocery lists included!

I found the weekly menus site through this blog which I just love!

Family Guidelines

I found this list by Harold and Lori Walker and thought it really hit on every behavioral goal we'd hope to live by as a family. It's in child-friendly wording and straight to the point:

1. Always use soft words, even when you don’t feel well.

2. Always display kind actions, even if you have been mistreated.

3. Show joyful attitudes even when no one is looking.

4. Have sincere motives with no thoughts of self-gain.

5. Think pure thoughts.

6. Always give a good report of others. Never tattle unless physical harm will come to someone. Use Matthew 18.

7. Never raise a hand to hit.

8. Never raise a foot to kick.

9. Never raise an object to throw.

10. Never raise a voice to yell.

11. Never raise an eye to scowl.

12. Use one toy/activity at a time.

13. Never go to bed angry or guilty.

14. Put Jesus first, Others second, Yourself last = JOY Make serving your family a priority.

Thankfulness

And LOVE.

Sometimes I wonder what it would be like if I didn't feel an overwhelming amount of thankfulness and love.... but I just can't because those two emotions dominate my life. I can think of so many reasons to be thankful, and while I am far from perfect, I never run out of compassion and love.

But what is on my mind right now is that day when I mentioned homeschooling to my husband. Not because I had a desire to homeschool... I mean, I really didn't. I had questions. I had a long list of reasons in my head of why I cannot. I found some entertaining answers on this blog.

My husband was positive and encouraging from the start... He even wanted to go to a homeschooling convention with me and find out more. We went... (I went) hesitantly. At the convention I realized something new: that it's a lifestyle and a state of mind... definitely not "School at Home" as I had previously imagined. Freedom. Freedom from the ordinary to explore and learn more about what truly matters.

Extreme encouragement.

Complete confidence. Passion. This is what I received from my husband in every conversation we had after that convention. And I don't take that for granted for even 1 second. He believed in me and still does, amazingly. I am thankful for new insights revealed to us each day that encourage us even more to be okay with being different.

For me, being different is not easy. I have always strived to be peaceful and do what is pleasing to others. Surprisingly, most of the people I know are totally comfortable with it and are extremely encouraging... Another thing I am so thankful for is amazing friends!!!

Lately Mr. C. announces to everyone he meets "I am a kindergartener, and my mom even let me start a early!" I am overflowing with thankfulness. I am so thankful for the freedom to homeschool. I am thankful to be part of so many networks that support and encourage me. I am thankful for our busy, full schedule and cannot wait to see what God will reveal to us each day.

I am mostly thankful for a husband who loves me and really, really believes in me even when I don't know how to believe in myself.

Love.

And Thankfulness.

That is really all I have to say.